Wednesday, November 16, 2011

I know I love you...but do I LIKE you?

As a stay-at-home Mom, showing love to my kids on a daily basis can be difficult. And my emotions and short-temper are only exacerbated by my pregnancy hormones. What to do, what to do? I try to remember to pray daily to be filled with love for my children and husband and read my scriptures, but I'm not sure it's working...and it worries me because my kids are only getting older and their memories are only getting keener.

So, I decided I'm going to focus more on liking my children. I know I love them. I know they love me. The love will always be there. You almost can't help it. But the liking...Oi!

Let's say you meet someone you like and you're trying to become their friend. Hey, I like that person, I'd like to get to know them better. Maybe you drop off a thoughtful gift. Call them on the phone. Shoot them a witty email. Plan a playdate (that's more for moms than kids anyway.) We do lots of things to try to get the message out that we like them, and we try our best to do things that will make them like us in return.

So, I ask myself, "Do I like my children?" Would I do all the above to try to win my children's affections? (While maintaining appropriate mother-child boundaries instead of becoming friends, of course!) Hmmm...No, I would not choose you as my shopping companion, but most of the time I have no choice, so I might as well act as though you are my chosen companion. I choose you, Little Friend. Let's have some fun together! I want you with me.

It's working today. Although, it is difficult to maintain when Charly is crying in my face because she's not getting what she wants. Most of my chosen friends don't throw tantrums...at least not in front of me. But most of my friends aren't four years old, either.

I'm just hoping this mindset helps me enjoy our time together. Because that's the abundant yet unavoidable commodity I have right now -- TIME with my children. That won't always be the case.

Just trying to make the best of it.