Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Thank You, Daryl

Last year I read the book, The Ultimate Career by Daryl Hoole. What an amazing book! Now, if you're interested and want to read it, I suggest you read chapters 11-21 first. The first 10 chapters are good if you want pointers on how to organize and clean your home. But the second half is a wonderful and beautiful tribute to motherhood and how to deal with everything from jealousy, guilt, fatigue and boredom. A nice little kick in the pants and lightbulb in the attic. I'll be sharing quotes on different topics now and again.

Blessed is the family whose mother's heart is in the home...

A mother whose heart is in the home feels a commitment to her sacred stewardship. She pledges to give her time and attention to her children. She is devoted to their care and well-being.

A mother whose heart is in the home knows her position to be a consecration. She is willing to sacrifice everything--even her health or her life, if necessary--for her children. She sanctifies her efforts. She recognizes she is engaged in a holy work.
(Hoole, 119).

Woah. Motherhood as consecration. It doesn't get much clearer than that. Once you become a mother, you have pledged to give everything you have to that role by default.

This is such a beautiful and terrifying thought. Take it one step further. I consecrate my body every time I carry and bear a child, then all my energies to rear him. I felt very strongly to get pregnant with Felix. I did NOT want to do it at all. Now I can't imagine life without him. I'm so glad I followed that prompting. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed I won't get another prompting for a while. BUT, if I did, I would follow it because I have no idea what lies ahead in my future and I trust Heavenly Father more than myself.

Once I couched motherhood in these terms, my children became much less annoying. When they needed things while I was on the computer or reading, I tended to them without annoyance. I committed to give them my time AND my attention. For some reason I'd never really thought about the attention aspect before. Computers can wait, I've made a commitment to care for my children.

Now, this doesn't mean you shouldn't take care of yourself, have girls' nights out, pamper yourself, take breaks when needed, etc. We have a lot of Monday movie-pajama days at my house. To be the best mother you can be, you have to take care of yourself. That's part of the package.

As I write this, Felix is rolling around my floor, crying to be fed. Perhaps I should take my own advice.

Until next time...


  1. Oh Nattie, I'm scared to read that book. Frightened really. I have done a lot of scary introspection and have discovered how lazy and shelfish I am. I had never thought of motherhood as consecretion, but I guess if I don't do it, who is going to? Abigail isn't going to learn her ABCs by herself, and really, there is a lot I can give my kids. I have found that there are many days when I really don't like reality. But at the same time I am starting to realize I am never going to get this time back.

  2. I really like that quote Nattie - seeing motherhood from that perspective and just accepting the commitment it entails really helps me to be more positive and PRODUCTIVE in my mothering... on the days that I remember to think that way!

  3. Nat, I have been reading some of these Daryl Hoole books too. Also, two of her daughters are in our ward and I have driven Ms. Hoole to and from the airport. Her daughters are amazing, so she must have taken her own advice. But I love this blog you have on parenting. You have such good posts, I am feeling a little guilty and a mess just reading them. Little Alma and Charlie sound quite similar. I keep telling myself that someday he will be 16 and I will tell him stories of how he cried until he could sleep with his superman costume that he has been wearing for the last two months and how we will laugh together. Thanks for making this blog, it is something I need right now.